what I wish were my second career....

You know, I think I need to take a trip to NY sometime really soon and sit down with the writers. The following sketches need *my* input:

• Weekend Update: As much as I love the segment, some of the "guests" are NOT FUNNY.
• ANY Character who is defined as "funny" because he or she talks funny. That's NOT FUNNY.
• Don't burst into song. Just don't.
• Get rid of Deep House Dish. Find another way to make fun of youth and pop culture. Please see rule about singing.
• Don't use the same pop culture icon more than once. Facebook as a verb ONE TIME is enough in one show.
  

When a show is 90 minutes long with commercials but only 40 minutes on its own, you really need to PAY ATTENTION, writers! We DVR viewers can count.